Saturday, January 29, 2005

a woman scorned........john legend is officially that dude. ive had the cd for 2 months and i havent gotten tired of it. if ya dont have it...get yo ass up and go get it...ASAP bitches. aight ummmm....i woke up this morning well rested but congested. having a cold wouldnt be so bad if this i didnt wake up with snot in my nose and a sore throat. i can deal with everything but this thick goo that constantly wants to ooze from my nose. colds suck monkey ass. i got up, took a long shower, got dressed, and went to the cafeteria. my appetite has been weird for the past week. i eat an veggie omelet and pineapples for breakfast, no lunch, and a bowl of frosted flakes or captain crunch and pineapples for dinner. im on a fruit kick....bought a bunch of oranges, nectarines, and plums yesterday. ive always liked fruit but never this much. id rather have a cold, juicy orange than jerked chicken and rice and peas. maybe my body needs more fruit and my cravings are its way of tricking me to eat more. next...i had a debate with a friend of mine. he *insert sarcasm here* thinks that im bi-sexual. the nerve of him questioning my gayness....LOL. the basis of his argument is the fact that i screamed when i saw lord jamar on law and order. i have always thought lord jamar is attractive but that doesnt mean that i wanna give him some booty. that just means that he is one of the few men in this world that i find attractive. and people wonder why i dont discuss my sexuality with the male species. im in no way a man hater but i get tired of explaining myself 5011 times. im a 100000000% penises that are attached to men are allowed over this way. hell to da nah. aight...thats enough. im takin my sick ass to bed. in a minute......peace and nyquil....cream out.

Friday, January 28, 2005

distain in my membrane......i decided to step out of my hibernation to write.....just for today....maybe. as always, i have a lot on my mind. i finally created my own forum!!!! to put it lightly, i got tired of remedial chics on forums and bp. just plain tired. rather than fall completely asleep from boredom or cuss somebody out for irritating me more than 3 times in 5 minutes, i created my own shit. feel free to sign up and vibe with some intellectual peeps. next....insomnia still dances on my brain. i have some weird sleeping patterns...either i sleep for about 12 hours or i dont sleep at all. i know that my never-ending thought process is to blame. it was brought to my attention for the upteenth time that i over-analyze things. sometimes i do. i also know that sometimes i make things more complicated than what they are. i have realized that not everything or everybody is as complicated and complex as me. lawd knows im complex. thats just me me or keep it movin. next...a new friend of mine told me that she peeped my blog. my blog is just a corner of my mind. there is soooo much more to me than what i write here. now, i do think that she will get a better understanding of me by reading my blog because most people know, i dont express myself very well verbally. i can write how i feel but i cant verbalize it. ive always been like that. lately ive been on a writing hiatus...there is a lot going on right, internship, finding a job after i graduate, and of course, some personal shit. im feelin some kinda way and to avoid saying something that i might regret later, i choose to say nothing at all. maybe ill decide to write about what is going on with me right now....later on, most high willing, i live that long. i dont know. back into my batcave i go. in a minute....peace and loyalty....cream out.

Saturday, January 15, 2005

24 years young.....i havent been writing because i havent had much to say. im back at school for my last semester and to be totally honest, im shook. i have my internship on mondays, wednesdays, and fridays and i have classes on tuesdays and thursdays. im ready to get this over with and start building. im ready to start living. my birthday is today and to say the least, it was uneventful. well, i did go to the mall and i bought a pair of boots, a pair of tennis shoes, and exchanged a shirt that i bought the day before. i got a lot of phone calls and 2 cards. i am now 24 years old...neva thought i would see 24. its not like i thought i would be dead...i just never thought past 21 when i was younger. i am the same age my mother was when she gave birth to me. speaking of my mother, im a little homesick. i miss my niece waking me up and sitting at the kitchen table talking to my mother. i even miss my big head brother and his girlfriend. like i said before, thats my fam....i love them more than they will ever know. next...enough of that sappy shit. i am still single, by choice. this is my time for me. ive been in 4 relationships, almost back to back. i never took time out for myself. so, thats what im doing now. anyone interested will have to wait a while. if she doesnt want to wait, it wasnt meant to be anyway. yeah, i know.....da queen is cocky as hell but sooooo what. like i said before, i am greatness and i refuse to settle for anyone that doesnt treat me as such. not actin like my shit doesnt stick cuz really does...but im one of the few good, honest, intelligent, drama and issue free womyn left in this world. i have my flaws but they are nothing that i cant change and im takin the time to work on them. aight yo....thats enough for now. im goin back in my hibernation. in a minute...maybe 2....peace....cream out.

Tuesday, January 4, 2005

P.S......creamy uhhh.....fresh like 0-5 like uhhhh. touch me, tease me, kiss me, please me...ill give it to ya just how ya like it girl. (if ya got ya mind right heffa) anyway, thats my shit. happy new year peoples. i drank 99 bananas and pineapple say i was tipsy on new years would be an extreme understatement. when that ball dropped, the rebirth began. if ya see some shit ya dont like that you can change, by all means change it. its a new year bitches....time for some new shit. 2005 is the year of me. by 2006, cream will be where she wants to be for the following 2 or 3 years cuz da queen is never content....i always want more for myself. no new years resolutions this year...just shit im gonna do, gonna see, not gonna tolerate, not gonna do, etc. no time for bullshit. ive been collecting my thoughts for the past 2 weeks. ive been doing more reading than writing. i cleaned out my closet and i didnt realize how many books i have. i have about 7 big boxes of books. a bookshelf is a must have when i get my apartment. ive been chillin in my room, bangin mos def, and thinkin a whole lot for the past 2 days. a gift was stolen from me, a new perspective on my life was born, my best male friend’s mother passed away (R.I.P. Queen), and my lifetime to do list was created. there are a lot of things i have in mind...yall will see soon enough. da queen is hungry for success. im creating a better life for myself as well as my future seed. next...details, details. ex #4 came over a couple of days ago and it was ok. she doesnt move me like she used to, meaning, the feelings of anger that i had for her have been dampened. i had a long talk with a close friend of mine and that convo opened my eyes to a lot. im not going to get into what happened to make me feel this way but, she is no longer welcome in my space. once you violate my space, its a wrap. her actions put a period at the end of the sentence. i DESPISE liars and gameplayers. do that shit with somebody else <<< my words to her exactly. im not going to taint my energy by despising her, but trust and believe, she is not one of my favorite people. if i never talk to her or see her again, would be cool with me. next...its almost time to go back to school. i must say that i enjoyed my time here. my mother’s boyfriend gets on my damn nerves but i didnt let him bother me. ive learned to like my brother’s girlfriend. she may have her ways that i dont like and i will always think that no woman is good enough for my brother.....but she gets a gold star from me. i think they will end up gettin married one day. im going to miss my niece most of all. thats my princess pie. she is so can tell her mind is like a little sponge. she always wants to know what something is or how something works. im going to miss watching dora with her. she screams my name when dora comes on and i can not be disturbed until it goes off. i might have to get her some dora dvd’s so she can watch her all the time. im going to miss my momma....she knows that already. when dorothy said there’s no place like home....she was sayin some real shit. i can be myself even tho sometimes i feel uncomfortable, they accept me for who i am. they love me for who i am and thats more than i can ask for. i love my fam...*wipin a tear from my eye*. aight yall...thats it for now. in a minute.....peace and honesty....cream out.