stripped......i have no appetite. the smell of food is making me sick. i know i sound like a pregnant womyn but uhhh....hell no. i have so much on my mind that food is the last thing i want. i was sick last week...i dont know where i got the damn cold from but damn the person for giving me their germs. i usually dont get sick. well, its gone now. i fought it off like a champ. next....i couldnt sleep last night...i tossed and turned...i finally decided to turn on the tv. i accidently pushed 4 instead of pushing 43 and there was a preacher on. so, i watched it. now, im not one to watch religious television...i havent been to church in about a year and a half either. the sermon was about looking back at your past and how looking back makes you lose focus on whats in front of you. i have been looking back on my past for so long that i have almost completely lost focus of whats in front of me. ive been so consumed with bullshit that happened to me that i am preventing myself from prospering....from living. after the preacher went off, anger filled my body. but, for what? its my fault that i did what i did but then i thought...dammit cream, you are doing the shit again. so, i got up and wrote everything i was feeling at the time, which turned out to be 8 pages of tear stained words and the deepest shit i have wrote in a long time. now that i have gotten it out, im going to look forward. looking backward did nothing for me but put crooks in my neck and locks on my brain. next...i really dont know how well i will do this semester...im working on my theory paper...praying to the most high that i pass it. as far as my other classes, i really havent cared this semester. so, whatever my grades are, i have to deal with it. im going to deal with the mess i made this semester and move on to the spring semester. no sense in looking back...its not going to change what has already happened. next...its time to cut my grass again. i have this feeling that there are a couple of snakes out there. aight...thats enough for now.....i gotta go to the bank. oh...before i forget. my tagboard is down soooo, leave your comments in the comments link at the end of each post. i want to know whats on your mind. ok...that being said....in a minute....peace and serenity....cream out.