thug changes...love changes.....it's funny how people change when they meet someone new. its like, their whole world consists of the new person and the people that were once important in their life, cease to exist. ive been guilty of that in the past but i know what it feels like to be one of the old people and not be paid attention to. no phone calls, no e-mails, not a damn thing. i try not to make any one person outside of my family, my central focus...thats just not healthy. there is enough cream to go around and i make sure everybody gets their one on one time with me. even if it is just to say what up, how you doin, how was your day? but, aint errbody like cream. i guess thats why i try not to get too close to people anymore. i dont want to build myself up for another failed relationship whether it be a girlfriend or a girl friend. so...i just do me. ive been in a deep mood for the past 2 days....just thinkin about what the world is comin to. when i talk to my grandma and she tells me stories of how it was when she was my age...i feel so funny, like she's talkin about another planet or something. leavin your door unlocked all the time?? movies for a dime?? takin a walk in dc at 3 am??? those things arent even fathomable now. i talked to her yesterday morning after the boy got shot at a middle school in maryland. honestly, it just reminds me of how much i am blessed to wake up to another day. all i think about is today, ill worry about tomorrow...god willing, i see it. in other news, me and honey have been talkin a lot more. last night, we stayed on the phone until 3:30 talking about what we want out of life and our goals. we have had some deep conversations in the past 2 days. my guard is always up, but she seems pretty cool. like i said, im takin everything for what it is....im just lettin things flow. school is gettin better...after i dropped that literature class, its been much easier. im really enjoying my islam class. its opened my mind so much. our professor is muslim and he prayed in front of the class to show us the things he has to do. hearing him recite the quran in arabic was beautiful. i felt this calm feelin come over me. that was just a beautiful experience for me. im gonna make it a must to take another religious studies class next semester. da kid is gettin sleepy....those late night conversations and my busy days are startin to catch up with me. thank you for comin out, god bless you, good night.